Find us on Facebook
This wearyingly ‘extreme’ feature début from stuntman-turned-co-writer/director/producer Kimani Ray Smith is intended as a hybrid of grindhouse horror, chopsocky actioner and sickly black comedy, but it doesn’t properly work on any level. The ‘Long Pig’, an underground Chinese restaurant, is run by Steven (Terry Chen, awful), who works with the sex-crazed Yuki (Alyson Bath) at kidnapping martial artists and forcing them to fight to the death, with the loser served up to rich patrons for dinner. When Jenna (Laci J Mailey) and MMA fighter boyfriend Nash (Sebastian Gacki) are abducted, the irksome trio of Tyrone (Alain Chanoine), Brian (Derek Gilroy) and Carlos (Bishop Brigante) must infiltrate the ‘Long Pig’ before someone gets made into spring rolls, and creator Smith lays on the comically bloody violence, dreadful overacting and shrill chaos with a trowel, creating a hugely detestable viewing experience, notable only for the fact that it should have been R Rated, especially with its unorthodox use of severed penises.
(Paramount Transmission, MA, 85 Mins)