WOMANz is the latest physical comedy offering from award-winning comedian Tessa Waters. Tessa combines dance, physical theatre, clowning and cheeky costumes to create shows such as How To Be A Lady, Sexytime! and Standing Up/Falling Down, all of which she has toured around Australia and to the major fringe festivals.

Tessa Waters is bringing her latest show, WOMANz to the Garden Of Unearthly Delights, so we sent her some questions. Here are her answers.

What drew you into performing comedy?

“I’ve always loved it; I was a very theatrical little kid. And I just haven’t lost the bug. I love to make people laugh as it just opens them up. I think comedy can be really powerful, you get someone to laugh first and they will be more open to talking about difficult topics.”

Who is your favourite comedian?

“Dawn French, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler.”

Comedian you would most like to be?

“Bill Murray or Kirsten Wiig.”

Favourite joke you knew as a kid?

“Fart jokes are king. My grandad used to sit at the table and do a big fart and then say ‘Oi, is that a bullfrog?’ Slayed me every time!”

Favourite movie line?

“My name is Indigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die.”

Favourite imaginary friend as a kid?

“I had an imaginary boy that lived under the kitchen table and used to kick me all the time so I would spend a lot every meal trying to kick him back.”

Job you currently perform in your alternative life when not performing comedy?

“I work in events sponsorship and management in my other life. Its pretty fun I got to stage-manage one of the firework sites in Melbourne this year. Eyebrows got a bit singed but no one died, so that’s a win.”

Your porn star name [first pet/first street]?

“Cecy McMaster… I’m thinking sexy kilts, I’m thinking sexy haggis, and I’m thinking double meaning around highland flings.”

What is your hidden talent?

“I play double bass.”

Favourite childhood memory?

“I used to pretend to be a wizard a lot, my mum made me the awesome green robe and I would walk around my neighbourhood in country Queensland with a staff and a sack of rocks and go sit in trees and write wizard poetry to the kookaburras… Look, I was a pretty cool kid.”

Celebrity meet that left you star-struck?

“I met Kylie’s mum in the girls’ toilets at the State Library at an exhibition launch. She was soooo little and shiny.”

Secret crush?

“I totally fancy DJ Whiskey Houston.”

How do you deal with annoying people who insist you tell them a joke once they discover you are a comedian?

“I ask them to pay me money: this monkey don’t dance for free, honey.”

What’s something from your childhood that you still love and have today?

“My MC Hammer Ken doll, with little rat’s tail and big purple parachute outfit.”

Best or worst advice you were ever given?

“Worst was be sensible. Best was just show up and everything will be fine.”

A missed opportunity that you would give anything to go back and try?

“The first boy I ever went out with, he gave me a Prince CD and played the flute… I wish I had given him a kiss at the end of our date. Somehow, though, I don’t think it was meant to be.”

Which comedian would you 1. Snog? 2. Marry? 3. Avoid?

“Chris O’Dowd, Amy Poehler and Bill Cosby.”

Has anyone literally wet themselves laughing at one of your shows?

“Yes it happens more than you would think. I mean, I get a lot of middle-aged ladies at the regional gigs and I say: ‘Hey ladies, don’t hold back on my account. Chuck on a Tena and kick up your heels’.”

If you were a flavour of ice cream, what would you be and why?

“Lemonade Icy Pole. The old-school style that they used to sell at the local pool. I’m the perfect summer companion: sweet, refreshing and I never disappoint.”

Tessa Waters performs WOMANz at The Garden Of Unearthly Delights’ Campanile from 8.15pm on Fri Feb 13 until Sun Mar 15.

Book at FringeTIX on 1300 621 255 or adelaidefringe.com.au/fringetix. Click HERE to purchase your tickets.

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